Well, I believe in using words instead of letters. Today, adoring public you are going to get a rant. This is about to be a rant worthy of Big Sara. I am not going to yell about sagging pants, the oil spill, or the economy. I am about to throw down about people that have stopped using complete WORDS in communications.
I am not even going to ask you to use a complete sentence; I just want you to use a complete word. I know this will offend some of my loyal readers but that’s just the chance I have to take. Some of you have offended me by doing exactly what I am about to talk about. I can’t lie, when you do it, it makes me love you a little bit less.
If you send me a text that says the following:
r u n?
You can now expect the following response from me:
If you continue to be a complete lazy SOB that can’t type out complete words, then please delete my number. I have nothing to say to you. Because I think you just told me to run and you were really asking “Are you in”?” So I am crazy pissed that I just took off in a sprint because you are a poor communicator.
I am without a doubt at the end of my rope on this one… its 2010… your phone has a full keyboard, type out the whole word. I mean for the love of God, most of our phones have auto complete and prompt you with the word.
Do not say THX to me. If you appreciate whatever I have done enough to say THANK YOU … then f-ing say THANK YOU. Take the 4 extra seconds to type the whole word.
Do not use x instead of s. EVER. Unless you are going to start calling me XHERRY.
Don’t put a z instead of an s either. That’s just as pathetic.
It’s YOU… not u. U is a letter. YOU is a word. If you use U… then YOU are an asshole.
And stop using letters for statements… No, I will not TTYL. What the hell? And if you type IMO instead of “In My Opinion”… well then I don’t give a shit about your opinion.
I am not sending this one out to the cosmic void. I am sending this one to each and every one of you that abuse the alphabet by whoring it out.
Stop it. Right now. I mean right now.