It’s February in Dallas. Which means snow and ice and being happily trapped inside. It’s a Facebook frenzy of snow day photos of kids and dogs. That’s part of the trouble with being a single non pet owner during inclement weather – I have nothing to post on Facebook. All I have to offer is a picture of my backyard.
As a singleton snow days are a bit less interesting. There is no blizzard sex, no snowman builds… there are marathon’s of House and the ability to go days without a shower or getting out of pajamas.
But it’s days like today that make me a bit frustrated with my single status. You see, in my head I would be married to a Marlboro Man/Cave Man type that would not only find it rewarding but also believe it necessary to manage the following aspects of all of this. He’d be up early to shovel snow off the sidewalks, he’d have scraped the ice of his giant 4×4 pick up truck and built us a fire even though we don’t have a fireplace.
He’d drive me to work or at least the grocery store and he’d be making a big ole pot of Chili or Gumbo. And he’d demand blizzard sex. So instead, I’ll just sit here watching episodes of House sitting in a cold house since I don’t really know how to program the heater. I’ll eat Goldfish and drink Dr Pepper. I’ll stare at the sidewalk wishing it was shoveled.
Maybe later I’ll get the trashcan lid and sled down the hill on my driveway. Unless there is a man out there that has shoveled his sidewalk, scraped his windshield and wants to come over to do all that at my house… in exchange for blizzard sex followed by Frito Chili Pie.
Until then, its back to House and Law and Order.